Sometimes you just HAVE to be a toilet

In our family, our kids are rarely called by their names. Ella's first nicknames were Butter, Butterino, Puppadino, One Sock Sally... These days Ella goes by Mrs. Melindez. To understand these names, you need to know my husband. Even when you know my husband you probably still won't understand. I should know I'm trying to figure it out everyday.

On a road trip Ella decided she didn't want to be called Mrs. Melindez anymore. So Don asked her, what she wanted her nickname to be. She looked in the rearview mirror at him looking at her and said with all seriousness, "Fire".

She then named Lily "Farm Animal" and Daddy became "Choo Choo Train". She seemed satisfied with all of these names and settled back into her car seat and looked out the window.

Don yelled into the back, "but what about Mommy?"

Ella perked up and said loudly, "Mommy is Toilet".

Don immediately turned purple. He was laughing so hard but no sound was coming out. He just looked at me. I was speechless. I asked her to repeat it just incase she actually said what I thought she said.

"Mommy you are Toilet."


She was all matter of fact, like this is a perfectly fine nickname for the mother who gave birth to all 9.5 pounds of her. Nice, real nice Ella.

So, Fire, Farm Animal, Choo Choo Train and Toilet continued on our car ride. Eventually I got a new nickname, but I have a feeling Toilet will stick around for a few years, especially if my hubby has anything to do with it.

Mommy Mantra- Make your kids an incredible Part of your life, not your WHOLE life.

Tonight the kids ate without Don and I. We both had late lunches so I cooked just for the girls. My girls LOVE salmon, so I bought these salmon patties from Whole Foods, they heat up really nice and it’s an easy go to meal for me. Salmon patties, cannelloni beans and peas; I know, it sounds terrible. To my defense, Lily ate her whole plate and then some. Ella ate all her salmon and peas and promised me she would eat the beans for lunch tomorrow. SO cute.

A Sleepover Forever

While we were away on vacation Ella and Lily shared a room the whole time. When we came home Ella asked me the most adorable question ever. "Mom, when can I have a sleepover with my sister forever?" Anytime she refers to Lily as "my sister" I melt. So that comment, coupled with Ella's adorable desire to spend every moment with her sister, made me want to smother her with kisses. This question started my quest at putting my two girls in the same bedroom together.

Before the change both my girls loved their rooms. I have prided myself in making their bedrooms the coziest little nests possible. I have filled them with the softest blankets, the happiest colors and all their favorite things. To me this is what a little girl's room should be; filled with joy and happiness and comfort. I was worried that with the change I would mess up their amazing sleep schedules and content nights. Still though, Ella's question tugged at my heart strings, I had to give it a shot.

This weekend Don took apart cribs, moved couches, lugged dressers - all without a single complaint. The whole time Ella was hopping up and down looking to help. With this change we were gaining Lily's old room back as a playroom. This made the move all the more appealing to Ella - Her very own playroom! I saw the happiness oozing out of her little smile.

Has it been seemless? No. Nap time is tough, but we are working out the kinks.

Being 11 years older than my sister, I never had the chance to do many sisterly things. We never shared a room, rode the school bus together, or shared clothes. I wish all those things for my little girls. We always read books about sisters and I try to drive home the lesson that they are best friends first before all others. I want them to always be close. I'm hoping that sharing a room will start them off in the right direction. I am a realist though; I know this love of each other and sharing a room will change with age, and we can switch it up then. For now though, tucking them into bed, reading them a book together and listening outside the door as Ella whispers "goodnight" to Lily is the most amazing way to end my day.

Mommy Mantra - Make your kids an incredible Part of your life, not your WHOLE life.
My brother is in town, so he picked up pizzas and we packed up and had dinner on the beach. The sunset was incredible, Ella and Don went swimming, Lily practiced her walking and I got to relax and enjoy one of the best perks of living on Long Island - the beach. Pizza, Cold Beer, Beach, Sunset, Family, Perfect. I want more nights like tonight.

Ella said "My ears are wiggling, I need...

Gum."

On our vacation to California, Ella discovered a new "true love". Since we were flying, I thought it would be an exciting way for me to introduce her to gum to keep her ears from popping during take-off and landing. I told her she could have gum only on airplanes or if her ears were popping in a car ride. Here we are 10 days later, back at home in New York and she walked into the living room and announced to Don and I, "Mom, my ears are wiggling. I NEED gum." She was serious as can be, and pointing to her ears, as if we could see them wiggling and duh, she NEEDED gum ASAP!

Rewind the clock 10 days and you would see us boarding a plane for San Francisco. Our cozy crew consisted of, Lily; my one year old who just learned to walk and was eager to show off this skill at every opportunity, Ella; my 3 1/2 year old who asks "why" every 30 seconds, and Don and I; two parents desperate for a relaxing, romantic, adventurous, soul-fulfilling family vacation. We knew we had our work cut out for us. It was a whirlwind trip with visits to San Francisco, Oakland, Big Sur, Carmel, Monterey, Napa...all while reconnecting and catching up with old friends. We were determined. The three hour time difference threw the whole thing off to begin with, so we had a "handicap" right out of the gate. Surprisingly though, Ella and Lily adjusted. I really want to recap the whole amazing trip with all the adorable moments, beautiful scenery and sweet family time, but there is too much to share and I fear I might bore you. We somehow managed it all though. We were able to visit with our greatest friends, drink amazing wine in Napa, drive the incredible Pacific Highway 1, stay in a "tree house" in Big Sur, roll around on the beach in Carmel, have a beer at Monterey Pier, enjoy a date night, hike Redwood forest, and on our last night, see Eddie Vedder in concert. We felt like rock stars for actually pulling it off; we connected as a family and were still able to have an adult-friendly vacation. The best part, our girls loved every minute of it.

When we got back home Don and I reflected on the trip. At home we stick to a great routine that works for our family, but on vacation we threw it out the window. Not realizing it at first, we both have the same philosophy. On vacation, not too much is off limits. The kids can stay up late, enjoy extra desserts, get dirty, laugh until it hurts and be as silly as possible. That is what makes vacations so exciting. As kids, Don and I both had that feeing when we would go away with our own families and it felt nice to bring that feeling to our girls.

Ella cried when we left California, but when we got home she hugged her toys so tight and tucked herself into bed. Vacation is so dreamy, but so is the cozy house to come home to.

Mommy Mantra - "Make your kids an incredible Part of your ife, not your WHOLE life."
Tonight Don cooked. He made breaded tilapia, rice pilaf with spinach and sauteed eggpant, mushrooms and zucchini. I am loving this stage with Lily, she is willing to eat anything we give her. Eating is so exciting to her because she is experimenting with a fork. Pile it on the fork and she happily picks it up and shoves it in. No matter what it is, she will pop it in and hand me back the empty fork to reload.

One and Done

My bottle removal philosophy. I keep chanting it to myself as my little Lily flower fusses and whines. I pulled the plug on the bottles with my 3 year old (Ella) the day after her first birthday and it worked like a charm. Lily is resisting a bit more and it is all my fault.

I broke the cardinal rule. I let Lily have her bottle in bed with her at nap time and early in the morning. Lily breastfed exclusively until she was 8 months old. She then self weened and switched full force into a sort of "baba" infatuation. She loved holding it and sipping it for extended periods of time. Her big brown eyes would roll back into her head in a state of euphoria when I would hand her the bottle. It became so easy to soothe her back to sleep early in the morning or get her to take a 3 hour nap. All I had to do was hand over the bottle drug.

As Lily's first birthday approached I was dreading taking away my crutch. My nap extender, my "Ace in the hole" in a time of stress. The bottle had become my "peace and quiet" facilitator. All the more reason to rip the band-aid off quickly and be done with it. One and done. The last bottle was on Lily's birthday. It was before bed. I told my husband I wanted to give her the last bottle. He looked at me with envy, this was a nightly ritual we both enjoyed. This time however he understood I needed this. I held her bottle for her and sang songs and let her slowly drink it for over an hour. Typically our nighttime bottle would be maybe 5 minutes, not tonight - it was her last supper so to speak. I teared up a bit as I quietly closed the door. A wave of sadness came over me. I then glanced at the pile of bottles I had to wash in the sink and the relief set in. Moving on.

It has been 6 days with no bottle. Six days of being greeted at 5am with a whiney little brown eyed beauty. I feel awful, but I know I need to hold strong. Nap times were tough in the beginning, but I am already seeing a difference. She is starting to soothe herself straight into a 2 hour nap, with little more than a whimper.

Lily is what most people would call a "content and happy baby." Withholding something she loves is so hard to do, because she rarely fusses. All the more reason to stay strong. The first day I felt like a mean old witch dangling bread above a starving child cackling. Terrible, so terrible. I just keep repeating, one and done, one and done, one and done. I like to think I am shaping a child who needs nothing except love as comfort and in turn having a little girl who can be content in any setting at any time without props or trickery. Fingers crossed.

Mommy Mantra - Make your kids an incredible Part of your life, not your WHOLE life."

Tonight we had baked chicken with fresh herbs from the garden, spaghetti in garlic, lemon and oil and asparagus, lots and lots of asparagus. My girls could OD on asparagus and still eat it the next day. It is my no fail veggie. We buy the massive Costco bag of asparagus and it only lasts a few days. Omelettes, pasta, on the grill. Delish.

I need more...

Coffee
Hours in my day
Time to myself
Time with my hubby
Coffee
Moments of silence
Coziness

I need less...
Rain

Moms Against Minivans

You will not find one here. If I could I would climb the highest mountain and scream, "I LOVE my Minivan." Maybe that is a little extreme, but I am a fan. I have been the proud owner of a Minivan for two years now. It has served as a portable house for my family's many trips, a place to change a screaming baby and sometimes a play-house for my energetic toddler. It has also kept us safe. We were side swiped by a crazy lady while we were on vacation last year, an accident that would have crushed my previous car - my Minivan prevailed and so did we. I love my Minivan and I say that with pride. This however, was not always the case.

I used to question the need. Why? Why? Why? They always looked so ridiculous. They are the antithesis of everything young and fresh. Once you got a Minivan you were well on your way to Mom jeans and a cropped short hair cut. Trading in everything beautiful and selfish for everything practical and selfless.

The plain fact is that once you resign yourself to wanting a large family, the Minivan becomes the obvious choice. While my husband and I only have two children now, it is our dream to have four. If he had his way, five. We decided if we are going to do this whole thing, lets go big or go home. We haven't looked back. I love everything about having the space.

I compare the transition to the Minivan, to my move from Manhattan to the suburbs. Do I miss my fast paced life in NYC? Yes, sometimes. What I don't miss is having to fold my clothes into tiny pocket sized squares so they could fit into my 1 foot wide closet. We moved out to the suburbs for space and stability and somehow as you get older those things become more and more important. In enters the Minivan; roomy, comfortable, easy to drive, easy to change a baby in, easy to keep a portable potty in the back, just easy. Those things have become more important to me than looking and feeling cool in my car.

Somehow though I still find enjoyment in driving my car. I turn up the radio loud, blast a little DMB, put my shades on and let my long hair blow out the window. No Mom jeans for this Mommy, no no no. At leasts that's what I'm saying today.

Mommy Mantra -Make your kids an incredible Part of your life, not your WHOLE life.

Tonight we made mini cheddar cheese sliders over a spinach and couscous salad. This was not a huge hit with the girls. Lily wiped her tongue after trying the couscous as if she was trying to wipe sand off of it. Ella poked the salad then drenched every bite with raspberry dressing to make it go down. I admit, this was a last minute attempt at a meal. Ah well, can't win them all.

Soft...Hard...Baby

Get your Mommy minds out of the gutter.

I'm referring to Ella, my 3 year old's toys. I have been trying to come up with an organizational system in her bedroom which allows her to clean up her toys after herself, wait for it....without the help of ME! Impossible, I know but I have been searching for a method. I think I found it.

Here is the breakdown;

Play Kitchen toys- self explanatory, kitchen items go in the kitchen.
Dress up- All dress up items go in her Dora the Explorer suitcase.

Then there are all those tiny little toys, stuffed animals and baby dolls - normally they end up in a heap in the middle of the floor.

We came up with 3 large baskets that we keep in her closet. Each are labeled.
Soft
Hard
Baby

Right now she is running around her room yelling "SOFT!" and throwing the stuffed animals in the Soft bucket. Earlier she went around grabbing ever baby doll, bib, outfit and threw them all in Baby bin.

Maybe once the excitement wears off, it will be back to me on the floor sorting through the sea of mess, but for now I am soothed by the sounds of Ella yelling "Soft, Hard, Baby!"

As you can tell, I had way too much time on my hands this week. I was sick, sicky sick sick. Couldn't go out to play, couldn't do much of anything. So I organized my house, my clothes, my online photos, I even tried organizing my friends. I'm glad I am feeling better, and can go back to being a bit of a mess. It suits me better.

Mommy Mantra - Make your kids an incredible Part of your life, not your WHOLE life.
Taco night!!! Blue corn tortilla shells, ground beef with homemade taco seasoning, shredded cheddar cheese, chopped tomatos, beans. Yum. Tonight was the first night Ella picked up the taco and ate it like we do. It was bigger than her little head and she was so happy.